My heart is filled up to the brim
With unending affection for you,
But every time you yelled at me,
Every time your hand rose over
My skin and your words slapped
Me harshly right over my frowns,
I bathed in nostalgia of torrid
Past traumas. Nightmares of
Red red violence, nails of abuse
Digging into my flesh too hard,
And the ghosts of grey anxiety
Returning to me once again,
Revolving around me in circles,
Their wan hands baleful to
Grab ahold of my fragile neck.
I wanted to stay, to hope for
A miracle, for you to change-
But none of my nerves have
It in them to re-live the terror.
My bones are too tattered to
Take even a spoonful more of
Unjustified disrespect, abuse
And garnet brute blood. So,
I take a leave now. To never ever
Look back, I breathe out my bye
As silently as I can, chanting peace.

#abuse #anxiety #toxiclove #her

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